Pause - 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes
I needed to hit pause all day. More realistically, all week. With little patience everything stressed me out. From the dishes piled up to the toys I tripped on to not understanding Charlotte and the early morning wake-ups from Isaac.
I wanted to hit pause to the whining.
I wanted to hit pause to everything dirty and dusty.
I wanted to hit pause to the car rides.
I wanted to hit pause to the stealing of toys and the ensuing cries.
Whenever we watch Charlotte's favorite DVD - Thomas and Friends - she says, "pause" when she needs to go to the bathroom or leave the TV for a moment. She's afraid to miss anything. The type of pause I needed, however, was one where I did miss everything. Where I didn't need to be needed. Where I could slip off alone, go to the bathroom alone, finish a book alone. Anything.
I needed to hit pause all day.
I finally got my pause when everything aligned for naps (all too infrequent these days) and both kids slept at the same time. My to-do list sat on my desk including the writings to finish and the edits to make. A list of phone calls to be made. Emails to send. And plans for an upcoming event. I needed a pause so I kept the list far from my eyes. Rather than try to do all the things in those precious 40 minutes, I did one thing. And one thing only.
In the past the kitchen has not been my place to take a break. The kitchen is usually more daunting than anything. Yet, the more I cook for my family the more I want to keep cooking for them. I love the smells that come from freshly baked items. I love seeing their joy when they take that first bite of food. I love how cooking demands my full attention. Because I'm not fully comfortable in the kitchen, I can't improvise or multi-task. I have to be focusing on one recipe and one recipe only.
Today I paused and baked.
As the ingredients mixed together and the oven preheated, the stress and worry faded away. As I waited for the food to bake I forgot about everything else.
For a few minutes I paused, and delighted in the joy of baking.
**All month I'll be participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes. Each day I'll take some time (sometimes 5 minutes and sometimes a little more) to sit down and write. It's about the discipline of writing each day. It's about listening to the words from within. It's about letting creativity work in me. I'll share my writing at some point during the day on my blog. Thanks for reading.